Friday, January 16, 2015

One Day You'll Find

One problem that arose with me in my last relationship was that of religion. He was not very strong in the church when we first met, but after a few short months of being together, he started to become more actively engaged. He even began to give me new insights into the gospel. My dad ordained him a priest and he was on the road to be a worthy priesthood holder and member of the church so that we could get married in the temple. I didn't realize it then, but he really had to change his entire life for me. He changed everything about himself just so he could be with me and marry me. That isn't a small task, that is actually a very big deal. But that was the problem, he was doing it for me. He was doing it so that he could marry me and the only way I would marry him was in the temple. I don't doubt that he felt the spirit and it touched his heart. I don't doubt that he believed the church was true, but I do think that ultimately he made the decisions he made in the church for me and not for himself. That is part of the reason that this is so hard for me. Why would a person put so much effort into changing just to throw it away? I cannot answer that question, nor is that question the point of this post. My point is, you shouldn't have to change everything about yourself to be with someone. On Sunday, I met with my bishop and I said all of this to him. I questioned how a person could change so much for someone and then just walk away like nothing happened. My bishop paused, sat up tall in his chair. He chuckled as he said, "One day you will find a boy who didn't have to change his whole life for you because he lived his whole life for you." The room went silent and I began to cry as I started to think that there is someone on the earth right now who is living for me. He is striving to be the best he can be so when we meet, he will already be an amazing worthy priesthood holder. And you know what I have realized? I deserve someone like that. Or I will. After I left his office I started thinking about if I was living my life in a way that one day my future husband would be proud of. That was when I decided to make some changes. I decided then and there that from now on, I'm not only living my life for me, but for my future husband and family. So that one day, I will find him and he will be so proud of me. Now, I wake up every morning and include a blessing on him in my prayers. I pray that he will be able to get through the trials in his life and that he will know that God loves him. I pray that as he goes through school and a job or whatever he is doing, he will be able to be strong and successful. I do this because life can get so hard and it can be extremely difficult and it can never hurt to have someone praying for you. I do this because I can't wait for the day when I meet him and I can say, hey I have been praying for you. I can't wait to see the look on his face. I challenge all of you, male and female, to pray for your future spouse and try everyday to be better for them and your future family. Never get discouraged or depressed if you lose someone that you truly cared for and love because one day you will find someone who will blow them away. That person is out there and if you trust in God's plan for you, it will all work out. If you believe that God does everything for your benefit, it will all work out. And if you have faith in God that he would never take someone out of your life that you're not better without, it will all work out. Always remember that being completely in love has everything to do with the gospel. As a couple, put God first, put the church first, and put each other second. Do this, and one day you'll find someone who has lived their whole life for YOU, and don't let yourself settle for anything else. 

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